Jesus answered, “My kingship is not of this world; if my kingship were of this world, my servants would fight, that I might not be handed over to the Jews; but my kingship is not from the world.” Pilate said to him, “So you are a king?” Jesus answered, “You say that I am a king. For this I was born, and for this I have come into the world, to bear witness to the truth. Every one who is of the truth hears my voice.” Pilate said to him, “What is truth?” (John 18:34-38)

Jesus remained silent when asked by Pilate, “What is truth?” I used to think this was the moment everything should turn. That Jesus would finally explain it all. That He would make it all clear, and somehow survive. In fact, no matter how many times you read it, there is this hope that it might turn out differently this time. But he didn’t. It doesn’t. He was silent.

Now I understand. His silence was the answer.

Because He compels a choice. You are with me or against me. You are gathered, or you scatter. Because the lukewarm option, the comfortable middle, that Jesus is a gifted philosopher, a wise teacher, or a mystic, is not an option. Jesus, is then a deranged lunatic, or Jesus is who he says he is. We now sit in Pilate’s chair. You must choose.

And what we do with that choice, is either affirm Jesus’ identity and confess as Peter did “You are the Christ,” or you deny him. Like Matthew did, do we rise and follow, or do we cling to our old way of life. Like John, do we remain at the foot of the Cross when it is hardest or do we desert him. If we do follow, if we do rise, we must then seek Him day after day, moment from moment. And when we stumble, get up and say Nunc Coepi, Now I Begin.‍ ‍

That is the true meaning of seeking truth. For He has already provided the decisive guide, the ultimate map to that truth, for He tell us: “I am the way, and the truth, and the life.” Jesus is truth in its most clear form. He did not answer Pilate because his life and purpose is the answer. Truth is not something Jesus came to explain. It is who he is. Pilate had truth standing right in front of him.

And in our own way now, so do we.

If you continue in my word, you are truly my disciples and you will know the truth,

and the truth will set you free

John 8:31-32

The map was always leading. To the Cross